Life + Underestanding God

-I watched the famous love story movie when I was just about 16 years old. I remember that I cried so hard at the end of the movie. When my parent came back from shopping and saw me crying like that were shocked that what happened and I told that I was crying because of that movie ended so sadly!
Anyway, Yesterday Oprah had interview with both Ali McGraw and Ryan O’Neil, the stars of love story movie. That was a touching interview, they played that movie about 40 years ago(1971) and it was a big hit at that time. They both have grown old now, and you could see change in their faces and as they said in their personalities and life style, the actual love story happened to Ryan O’Neil in reality. He lost his wife Farah Faucet after 30 years that they were together last year. She had a long battle with cancer. Watching that interview made me thinking about how fast life goes by and youth ends, we all grow old and our era ends. While we are young most of us think that we are the center of life but we are just a drop in the ocean of life and when we disappear nothing really happens and life goes on and on.
We all know these facts more or less but we are so attached to this temporary life and youth and at the same time don’t use it to the maximum and waste big chunk of our time in getting upset about little things, thinking about past, planning about future and other useless stuff.
I am learning more and more every day to try to be more present and enjoy little things here and there. Try to just let it go and forget about little unpleasant things. It needs lots of practice and I am not a very smart and fast student in this specific important course of life but I am trying…

-It’s been raining crazy in southern California in last few days. I have not seen such a heavy duty rain and storm in last 12 years that I have moved here. Last night while it was raining so hard I was thinking to myself that I hope all the homeless people can get a place in homeless shelters and stay safe and dry in this rain . Winter is the worst time of the year for them. While I was thinking about homeless people I turned to my husband and said if I were god, I would not let any poverty to exist. Everyone would have at least a minimum for living (that would be everywhere on earth, not just socialist countries). Everyone would have a roof on top of his head and enough food to eat. There would be differences in people life style and amount of their wealth but no poverty. I would let every human being to age up to 60, so they would have enough time to experience life at some extent. Nobody would die from a very painful and long term sickness. It
would be a quick heart attack or accident. I would not let any child to be born handicapped or retarded. I would take a way greed, jealousy and violence from human kind. So there would not be any war. I would not let human beings to discover that they could use narcotics for fun and enjoyment. I would disable that part of the brain that enjoys drug…
May be god has reasons to have all this going on in our life but we are like a kid that do not understand his parents when they say you cannot have more chocolate or you cannot play with fire. May be we just cannot understand god. I know that he is grater and nicer than what we all think but I am too little to understand his policies. May be he gave us enough choices and brain and that’s all up to us to lead a good life… who knows…but something that I know is not every one get same equal opportunity since he/she is born…

I wish everyone who celebrates Christmas, a very great Christmas and great New Year full of joy and happiness...