Friendship

Today I want to talk about my friends and friendship. Some thing that has been on my mind recently.
In last ten years, all of my close friends have moved out of IRAN. Fortunately my best friend that I know her since we were 10 years old lives just one hour a way from me in Orange County and another close friend of mine lives in same area as well, I have other friends in Canada, Germany and Italy! I am very good at keeping in touch with friends and I always try to send email, or sometimes call especially on their Birthdays so I won?t loose contact with them. I have made some new friends here too, but the friends that you know from school time and grow with you are different.

However, I wish I had all my friends here in my town and close to me like long time ago in Iran. I really care for friendship but these days I feel that true meaning of friendship is changed to lots of people, or may be the busy life style of today life has changed it?s meaning!
For instance I and my best friend that lives one hour a way have been always very close. She always was there for me whenever I needed her and I was always there for her too but lots of things changed in her life in last couple of years that I believe those events changed her as well. She moved to US before me and got married here. She was not happy in her marriage life from the beginning although she got married because of love. Her and her husband would not get a long well and they had lots of differences, any way long story short after five years of constant struggle, she got divorced and it was a nasty divorce! Any way after her divorce, she started to hang out with single people mainly divorced girls and her life style was single life style. I was happy for her to be able to get back on her own and become happy again, She met a guy that from the beginning I knew it was not right for her and I told her but she did not listen (after two years of relationship they broke up.), any way she would spend most of her free time hanging out with her single friends or her boy friend which I completely understand. We would see each other less often, I know that I have a busy life and since I have a little kid my schedule is tight but I always have time to see my friend for couple hours and have a coffee and chit chat. Any way My friend is dating some one else now and they are very serious and I hope this guy is the right guy for her and they end up getting married since that?s what she wants, but we don?t see each other as much, we have not seen each other for 4 months now. She rather spends all her free time with her new boy friend. I understand her situation and if that makes her happy, I am happy for her too but I think we can always set aside some time for our friends too. When I was engaged with my husband and she was married I always set aside time to see her and be in contact with her. Although we don?t see each other often I always care a lot about her and love her as a sister but I have come to conclusion that when you are married and have your own family your husband and your kid are your best friends, other friendships become relative and especially if you have single friends they rather hangout with singles because it is more fun and they can be more available and they are more flexible!

So over the years people change because of the different changes in their lives and that definitely affect their personalities and their relationships, they still remain your friends but your friendship changes for sure! And this is another fact of life that you learn by time! Some thing else that I have learned and I should confess is that men in general or at least the men that I know around me, are better in keeping balance with their friendships and their girl friend, fianc鬠etc. They don?t keep distant with their old friends because they are in relationship with a woman. Girls, especially Iranian girls sacrifice every thing else around them because they are in love or involved with a guy! Again I am talking about the girls that I know I am sure not every one is like that.
Any way I love my friends and I care for them but I think my true friends are my family
My husband, my son and my mother now!